Not So Hot Pink

FYI: Just because you look like you have been highlighted doesn’t make people think those parts of you are important. Oklahoma

Touched By An Angel

It figures! The one time in my life I need to call on my guardian angel, mine takes the day off and I’m stuck with the substitute! Idaho

The Mullet?s Stepsister

Ahhh yes, the rare asexual female rat tail. Although rare, unfortunately they are not yet extinct. Virginia

Infringement

Is that circled leg jean fringe? I didn’t even know you could do that. It’s like a new line of Sesame Street Big Bird pants. Texas

Stop Or My Mom Will Shoot

Sometimes you have to go deep undercover. How do you think the queen of all homemakers Martha Stewart got caught? Texas

Red vs. Green

Okay it’s debate time people. Who wears ‘em better (and by “better” we mean which one do you want to cut down at the knees less?) – Angry Red Monster or Goofy Green Girl? North Carolina

Eat Mor Chikin

Okay, I see you’re attacking the term “cowgirl” from all angles there, which I commend; however, I still don’t think that’s what your man meant when he said he liked cowgirl. Illinois

Moons Over My Hammy

We landed on the moon! You can tell by all the rolling hills and craters…..and the fact that you would want a spacesuit before touching down. Oklahoma

Peanut Butter And Bandanas

What type of failed wrestler are you? And is that a knee bandana? Unless you’ve been shot in the leg, there is never a need for a leg bandana. You are never going to get your shot at the Championship belt so give it up and keep making your way on over to the Poison [...]

Squeal Like A Pig

I am going to become a millionaire once I create denim tank tops, because it is fairly obvious from the overall business that people love denim and silver buttons on their nipples. Georgia